i think this could feel a little bit like giving birth...and then sending your child off to kindergarten all in one day....

not that i would really know...but...if i had to guess...i would say that's probably a pretty accurate description...

last night was, of course, the cd release party.

so...of course there should probably be a blog...and i think i'm going to divide it into two sections.

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section one: the main event
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thursday morning i woke up unusually early (when i say early...i actually mean ten in the morning...which you must realize is early for an insomniac musician like myself). i went upstairs...and started to check my e-mail. my phone rang. it was one of my best friends who lives in virginia. we talk probably once or twice a week...so nothing seemed out of the ordinary. the first thing she brought up was the weather...asked what it was like in nebraska...and then proceeded to tell me that it was 70 degrees and beautiful at her house. we proceeded to plan out a way for her to get out of the office by telling her boss that she had errands to run...great scheme, right? turns out...the joke was on me...about twenty minutes later (while i'm still checking e-mails) my little sister points behind me and says "it's lauren". i, not knowing anyone named lauren in nebraska, was very confused. then she said it again. "it's lauren". and much to my surprise i turned around...and there she was...my friend from virginia. what a surprise. later that evening two more of my best friends showed up with my sister...ready to help me get excited for saturday night. i had lots of errands to run on friday...a tour of downtown omaha to my out of town friends...piano lessons to teach in bellevue...and band practice for three hours to get ready for the next night. and then...there was saturday.

the morning consisted of the usual stuff...followed by a panicked afternoon run to target to try and find the perfect necklace to wear to the show that night. (needless to say i didn't end up finding one) and then it was off to the airport to drop off lauren and pick up two more friends that would be coming into town for about 12 hours. after that...i headed off to PS collective to start setting up with my friends in tow. they set up a fantastic looking merch table...while i practiced with my bgvocalist and sound checked with the band. and right around 7:15...people started showing up...to my surprise...i never really got nervous (i attribute that to the fact that i've played like a million gigs in the past eight months...ok...maybe that's an exaggeration).
my good friend stephanie pilypaitis started the night off...even though she was super sick...and things looked to be off to a great start. my dad and brother even figured out a way to broadcast the concert live over the internet so family and friends from across the country could watch...fabulous!

to make it short and sweet: i got up and played three songs acoustic...and then was joined by the band (who are probably some of the most fantastic musicians i know) for the next ten songs. and let me tell you. that was probably the best forty five minutes of my musical career thus far...yes, there were a few slip-ups..but i LOVED every single second of it. especially playing 'why don't you' off the album and 'maybe i'll just wait'-which is one of the newest songs i've written. i'm pretty sure that the crowd LOVED 'i wanna hold your hand'...since pretty much every single person i talked to afterward said it was one of their favorites of the night. i finished up with three more acoustic songs...and then...mingled...packed up...and headed home.

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section two: where do i go from here
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i got home with my friends and family (everyone was totally beat from the festivities of the day) and pretty much right away my parents asked how i felt about the night. and about as soon as i opened my mouth...the tears started flowing. the night was over. this night that i had been planning for about six months. come and gone...in what literally seemed like the blink of an eye. and this night was, for me, very symbolic of the fact that now...my music is out there...for anyone and everyone to feel any way they'd like about it. to love it. (hopefully) to hate it. to pick it apart and analyze it. to let it change the way they view life. and i now have no control over that part of the equation. thankfully...my friend lj picked up on the situation and pulled me outside to get some air. well...i continued to cry...and babble...and just go on and on about how...this is it. i'm committed now. i can't just give up and decided..."well...i don't wanna do this music thing...it isn't practical...i'll just get a real job like everyone else". nope. i'm a musician now. for real. and tonight...writing that out...scares me like nothing else.

and what does any good real musician do after a fantastic show? taco bell run, of course. so my friends, sister and i ran to the bell to get some late dinner. and how does a real musician spend the rest of the evening/early morning after one of the best shows of her life? by watching a documentary on overweight dogs and cats in england and talking til three in the morning with one of her best friends...

really. would any respectable musician end the night any other way?


jessicalindsey